You, Me and He Equals Nine?
by oncerforlifeig
Summary: A DOQ one shot about a pregnant Mal and her expanding family.


"Mal!" Two voices shout in a scolding fashion simultaneously, to which the blonde turned around slowly, putting on her puppy dog eyes halfway through before facing her lovers. "Yes?" She asks in faux innocence, trying to buy herself some time to explain the predicament she's caught herself in. "What are you doing?" Robin speaks up first, both him and Regina folding their arms across their chests. "Umm…" Aquamarine irises dart around the room, she still hasn't come up with a lie or excuse, "nothing…" Mal answers sheepishly, slowly stepping away from the stove. "It sure doesn't look like nothing," This time the female brunette speaks, trying to ignore the mess that had been made in her kitchen, her tone is a bit more effective at scolding, "You know you aren't supposed to be down here cooking-"

"I know but-"

"But nothing," Robin interjects, walking over and placing a hand on the small of her back, "Let's get you back upstairs and into bed where you belong." She'd resist and insist that she's fine but the looks on the two-thirds of her heart is more than enough to make her obey. For now at least. "You two treat me worse than a child, you know….It was just a simple recipe I was trying to come up with for the restaurant" Maleficent comments as she's escorted back upstairs, her steps deliberately at a snail's pace.

"You're carrying our offspring, it's only right that we be cautious about things," Regina's voice carries, "and cooking would be fine if you weren't supposed to be on bed rest." They've been like this ever since they found out she was carrying triplets; two girls and a boy. Six kids in total. _Six_. Well, she had always wanted a big family and now she was going to get it.

"But Ginaaa….Robbie…" The dragon whines just as they reach their bedroom, Robin pulling back the sheets for her to get in. "No buts, now get your butt back into bed." Reluctantly, she does as told, kissing the marksman in thanks after he helps prop her up, countless pillows supporting her back to make sure she's as comfortable as possible. "I'm starting to wonder why I let you two knock me up."

The pair chuckle as they stand at the bedside, Robin grinning after he's kissed, "Because you love us as much as we love you." The blonde scoffs, though he's completely right, "Will you at least keep me company? It's boring up here by myself…" This time when she turns on the puppy dog eyes, it works, guilt-tripping them both into abandoning their work to stay with their pregnant lover. "We should get you a puppy so you won't be so lonely and use that bloody look against us." Both women can't help but laugh at him, the trio settling into bed with the pregnant mother in the middle, a hand coming from each spouse to rest over the eight-month swollen belly, earning a pleasant hum from Mal.

"We still haven't picked out names…You two always disagree when it comes to the girls." Robin's hand is stroking soothing circles in one spot while Regina's is going back and forth over the swell. "It's easier to name boys; Andrew Robin Mills-Locksley. How can you not just fall in love with that?" The proud father smirks, just then earning a kick from one of his offspring.

"See, m'boy already loves it and he's not even out here yet." Robin leans down and kisses the spot where he felt the tiny foot, the dragon watching on lovingly. "In that case, we'll pick the girl names now. How about…Bailey Mallory Mills-Locksley?" Regina muses, waiting for the other mother to nod her approval, which comes a few seconds later. "And last but not least, Cameron Reagan Mills-Locksley."

After all three all approved of their children's names, they went on to discuss their emergency plans in case Mal's water breaks before they can get to the hospital for her scheduled date. Her brunette having made the both of them memorize every bit of it because she was a perfectionist and her children were going to be safe and have only the best.

* * *

"Mommy! Mommy! Come quick!" An olive toned hand pulled at the apron around her waist and Regina spun quickly on her heel to chase after the child who begged for her attention and ran back into the living room. She was going to voice her concern until she was greeted with the sight of a five-year-old getting ready to swing a bat in her house. "Cameron Reagan!" At that, both curly, blonde headed girls' heads snap around, their brunette brother hiding behind their mother's legs, noticing that glint in his azure eyes that hinted he was the one who snitched.

"Have you and your sister lost your minds?!" Bailey tried to hide the baseball behind her back but the bat in her sister's hand was still a dead giveaway, "We just wanted to play baseball and it's raining outside…" Came the response from Cam, her perfected sheepish look all thanks to her blonde mother, who she was almost the splitting image of, though traces of Robin and Regina were still prominent. "What's going on in here?" Robin asks, walking into the house just in time to catch the scowl etched across his wife's features while his son still hid.

"Your daughters were trying to play baseball in the house!" The marksman picked Andy up, mentally noting that they would have to talk later before kissing a tanned cheek and directing his glare toward his two girls, What on earth possessed you to think that was okay?" But before they could get an answer, Maleficent came out of the brunette's office they shared, having been in there to handle some paperwork for her restaurant. Silence fell among the living room, Regina was intimidating, Regina and Robin together were even more intimidating, but Mal?

She was a force to be reckoned with and they knew better than to try her. "What's all the ruckus about?" She questioned, pecking both her wife and husband's cheeks, though the look on their faces meant one of their six children, no doubt from the younger three, had done something they shouldn't have. "Our daughters were about to play baseball in the house," The pair answer simultaneously. Without another word, Mal walked between them and held a hand out to each blonde, signaling for the equipment to be relinquished. Neither daughter argued or hesitated to do so, hanging their heads in an apologetic manner. "Sit. Both of you." Bailey's chocolate eyes shot a glare her sister's way, matching eyes returning the look easily as Cameron mouthed 'this is your fault'. "Hush it!" The elder blonde instructs, well aware of how their daughters would silently communicate, especially when they were in trouble. "Firstly, apologize to your mother for even contemplating potentially ruining the living room." Both of them turned their heads and spoke their apology to their other mother, heads whirring back to face the blonde in the center of the room.

"The next time you do something like this, you'll be in a lot more trouble than just no dessert for a week. Understood?" Oh, an argument was on the tips of both of their tongues, it's Regina's stubborn trait no doubt, but the cocked brow daring them to do so is enough to keep their mouths shut and only receive a nod of their heads instead. "Good. Now sit here and play _quietly_. If I hear anymore nonsense, two months. No negotiation." Mal walked over and kissed the tops of both of their heads, the hair texture reminding her of Robin's and how he would keen every time she rubbed and scratched at his scalp, making her grin as she glances up to see her spouses watching on with curious but proudness etched across their features.

"Here you go. And I'll take that," Maleficent hands him the bat and Regina the baseball, taking their son and heading back into her office, closing the door behind them. Little Andy was her shadow half the time when he wasn't following behind Regina, and no one but the two of them knew it but he could communicate with Mal through his eyes; mother's intuition, she figured, something else she missed out on with Lily. From the moment she had stepped out of the office, she saw the way he wanted to be with her and since he knew how to be quiet, unlike his rowdy sisters and older brothers who were always on blabbering about comic books or superheroes, she didn't mind his company.

"God, I think she just won my heart over all over again," Robin breathed out, turning to his wife who was equally amazed, giving him the perfect opportunity to steal a kiss, to which she smirked and pulled him in for more, putting on quite the show. "Ewwww!" Came from the living room as their troublemakers were forced to witness two of their three parents make out; a punishment that befit the crime. Mal heard it and sniggered quietly, her big family was perfect.


End file.
